Monday, May 19, 2014

The Working Mother's Decorating Guide

You know how it starts.  You walk through the door after a bad day and deposit your purse, your jacket, the kids' jackets, a handful of papers from kindergarten, a couple art projects from preschool, some mail, and four of the fifteen sippy cups from your car on the dining room table.  Three hours later, the kids are finally in bed and at last you have the chance to  rest for the first time since everyone woke up at 5:30 AM.  You look over at the pile of crap on the table, and you think, "yeah, no."

A couple days later, you do laundry.  By the time you get the 10 millionth tiny sock folded and all 180 pairs of toddler underwear tucked away in the kids' drawers, you look at the pile of adult-sized clean clothes on your bed, and you think, "yeah, no."

On the weekend, while sitting at a swim class, maybe you look at Pinterest or a Pottery Barn catalog, and you have all these IDEAS of how you'll finally print off all those family photos and arrange them in an elegant gallery wall, or create that baby book you've been meaning to put together for the last three years, or paint this room that gorgeous color and hang some beautiful drapes and...yeah, no.

And so it goes.  Until one day you blearily look around your house and realize...it's a total fucking nightmare.

Then you have two choices:

1)  You can start cleaning.

2)  You can start laughing.

I love design blogs as much as the next person, but come on.  Those people are either lying or living a completely different life from me. And since I still didn't feel like cleaning, I set out to document our mess in this helpful style guide for working parents:


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Sure, I could have used the time I spent taking pictures to, I dunno, START CLEANING MY HOUSE. But this was much more fun.

(You'll notice there are no pictures of our dining room or bedroom here.  That's because there is a limit to how much of my shame I'll put on the internet and those rooms were way WAY over it.)

Monday, January 27, 2014

Another milestone, sort of

Last Saturday we embarked on the three-day mission to potty-train Aerin using the same method we did for Micah. Since she'd already been staying dry and using the toilet at daycare, we figured it would go pretty smoothly.

It did not.

Day one was great. Day two nearly killed us all (zero successes, ONE MILLION temper tantrums). I went back to work for the afternoon of day three, and then I left town for days four and five, during which Micah got very sick and had to stay home from school. I got back home Wednesday evening just as Aerin crapped her pants for the third time in as many hours. Todd, after two and a half days alone with a sick boy and a ticking pee bomb, greeted me with all the relief of a soldier coming off the front lines and immediately poured himself a drink.

So here we are on day 10. Pee goes in the potty, mostly. We played outside most of the day yesterday without any accidents or unsuccessful emergency runs inside. She still refuses to poop. We have to go up at 10 PM and 4 AM to take her to the bathroom so her sheets stay dry. She stays dry all day at daycare. So...mission sort of accomplished?

I'm leaving town again this Thursday and won't be back until Saturday afternoon. And the daycare just called to tell me Aerin's running a fever.

Good luck, Todd. We're all counting on you.